I'm terrified of life leaving me behind

I miss my heater,

Warming my tiny little room, miles from here. 

There I was alone with my thoughts -

Solitude was my confidant.

Snuggled in my bed, listening to the rain fall.

I had an idea of where my life was headed;

With some sense of a future. 

Now all that is gone. 

But this is not all bad.

There is family here - 

Love and support. 

I just wish that my mind wasn't so muddled. 

I wish that I was more grateful. 

I just hate that I feel as though

I am going nowhere slowly.

Time is running out. 

I have unknown deadlines -

Because I know I can't sit idly forever. 

Life must go on. 

And it will –

With or without me. 

And I’m terrified of being left behind.

-N.M-