I miss my heater,
Warming my tiny little room, miles from here.
There I was alone with my thoughts -
Solitude was my confidant.
Snuggled in my bed, listening to the rain fall.
I had an idea of where my life was headed;
With some sense of a future.
Now all that is gone.
But this is not all bad.
There is family here -
Love and support.
I just wish that my mind wasn't so muddled.
I wish that I was more grateful.
I just hate that I feel as though
I am going nowhere slowly.
Time is running out.
I have unknown deadlines -
Because I know I can't sit idly forever.
Life must go on.
And it will –
With or without me.
And I’m terrified of being left behind.