I’m tired of being all up in my head. I just don’t want to think so much. I know that this is the process I need to go through to figure stuff out, but the more I look into future career options, the more overwhelmed I get.
I'm terrified about being rejected again. I'm terrified about making the wrong decisions. I'm terrified of staying in the exact same place that I am right now. But I’m also afraid of settling for something that will leave me feeling miserable for the rest of my life. But saying that makes me feel a little dramatic. Sometimes I feel as if trying to be happy, or trying to find a place that I will be happy is just like I’m running on a great big race track that just goes round and round in a circle – I’m never truly going forward.
I know that sometimes we just have to take risks and see what happens. I have nothing to lose but time, right?
But, Time is still the enemy, and I don’t know how to make nice. We don’t even have to be the best of friends, but it certainly would help if we got along with each other. I feel like this Time just keeps walking all over me; and I let it.