I want to be independent; and free to do my own thing. Go where I want to go, do what I need to do. With nothing to hold me back.
But it seems a little difficult sometimes. I think that I’m afraid of the big bad world; afraid to take risks; to jump without a safety net. I’m alone here. Who will come to my rescue if something happens? Who will be here to catch me if I fall?
Yea, I know it kind of defeats the purpose of wanting to be independent. I know that I will always have my family, but right now they are far away. It is a little intimidating to just brave the cold and plunder forth, but living under a shell is not much fun either.
Every year I tell myself that it will be different. I'll try new things, go out, be adventurous, and meet new people. But I never seem to get around to it. There is always one excuse or another. Either the timing doesn’t seem to be right, or I feel that I should rather be saving money.
Sometimes I wish that I had a simpler life. Filled with all the things that my heart desires. Never having to budget or worrying about price tags. I wouldn't be one of those big spenders, but I just want the freedom to do what I want to