Monday, 9 July 2012

Brain overload

It's just about that time when my brain feels overloaded with all this info and it almost feels as if it's about to shut down.... Some of these lectures can be so boring! And some go so fast that I end up getting lost half way through and then zoning out completely.

Sigh - I need to find some solid ground before it all shatters beneath me. But it still seems like the same saga over and over again. I know how important this all is, and I know how hard I need to work. I've even drawn up a list of goals and positive affirmations for the semester. So what more is there left to say?

It's getting to the point of total absurdity. I mean everyone else in this situation has grasped the reality of it all, and they have "taken the bull by the horns" this time around. And they are doing really well. So why can't I? Why do I find it so difficult?

I'm beginning to feel a little pathetic and ashamed. I know deep down that I am capable of retaining all the info that I need to know. So what is stopping me?
I'm tired of having all the answers but having nothing to show for it. Tired of making empty promises and selling myself short.

I feel as if I'm the only one facing these problems. But I have so many opportunities to change and grow as a stronger and more confident future doctor. Maybe it still all boils down to whether I believe in myself or not, whether I believe that I have what it takes.

Sometimes I wish that there was a magic potion that I could take to help me, and to make it all easier...

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